Crash

I have dreams where something bad happens to me, and I wake up crying. Well, today in reality I wish I could cry. I wish I could stop this void that I have in me. There is nothing that I want more than to be happy. Why am I not happy? I am practically having the time of my life. I guess I am not. I just wanted Zach to be happy tonight. Apparently that was too much to ask for because he was in a crappy mood which made me become into a crappy mood too. I also wanted to hang out with Catherine. I apparently ask to much. I am getting into a depressed mood again, so if I start posting up crap it is just that I have nothing else to put up.

How did I manage?

I managed Christmas better than I did that of Thanksgiving. On Christmas Eve, Zach's brother Steven and his lovely wife Kate, came up from Murray, Utah to spend Christmas with their family. It was fun to see them again. Terri invited me to have dinner with them last night before I went home. Of course me trying to get on their good side decided to stay, and I at least let me parents know. Well, my sisters were coming up from SLC also and they hadn't arrived yet, so that is another reason why I stayed. It was nice for me to at least know that they don't totally hate me. I hope they never do. They are like family to me. So after I had dinner with the Farrer family, I went home, and on my way home my sisters pull in front of me and I followed them on the way home. It was funny to follow them all the way from Rexburg and then watching them freak out when I pull into the driveway right after me. They were here for a little while last night, and then they went to their hotel and slept until this morning. We had a house full this morning with three of my neices, my brother and his wife with her mother, two of my sisters, and another in-law, with the three of us already living here. Trust me that was a crazy time when everyone was here.

Life in Winter!

So today I went to work with icy roads in the Rexburg area, and almost a clear highway 20, and slushy Idaho Falls roads. I did money/mail today for the pool, and while I was driving the truck that the pool owns, the rear end is sliding all over the place. Lets just say it was my first time experiencing sliding, but I actually did pretty well and remembering what I was taught. My little car did that after work when there was snow falling, so the roads were worse on the way home. Work went perfectly well today, and I am sorta looking forward to working the next five days left of this week! Tomorrow I start work here in Rexburg on Campus at the pool doing the same thing I do in Idaho Falls. This can be the boring job of my life, but yet really like it because of what I do and what I think. Just being on campus sends you thoughts to Christ. At least for me it does. More than likely what I will do is take my laptop, search the internet, watch movies, read books, and watch people swim back and forth! I know, not the most exciting thing to do for five hours, but I get paid to do this!
This evening when I came back to Rexburg, Zach, Derek, and I all hang out on Derek's days off, so we always do something or another. Tonight we went to Fongs, and before we go in, we play a little in the snow, and write in the snow and look up at the snow. Tonight I think was just gorgeous in all perfectness I think! Winter can be dangerous, but glorious at the same.

Hurt

I have a song by Johnny Cash titled "Hurt". I like it because it starts out mellow with only an acoustic guitar, then when the song is almost over with the drums come in and liven it up while he makes his voice louder. I guess we don't really realize that we all hurt within ourselves. We just tend to think that each of us have or own problems while everyone else goes on happily living their lives. I know that isn't true. My grandmother's students, friends, family, and coworkers were all hurt when she died eight years ago. Not only me, but all of them. All of them that came to the church house and overflowed the chapel and cultural hall on that Saturday. Lately I have been thinking that I am the only one hurting with issues that I have with my family and with my coworkers and my fiance's family, but that isn't true either. Zach likes to complain a whole lot and make it seem like he is stuck is this place that seems to be rotting to him, but I see it as the other way around right now. He has the option of going on a walk to the park or job searching, but the other people that are there during the day are trying their hardest to keep their heads above water more than he is. I just never heard someone cry to their significant other about their feelings like I did last night. Couples seem so happy when they are out in public, but is inside four walls that can change their relationship significantly. On TV shows we always see this happy couple and everything is going good, there are no problems, there are no outside problems from family, or entertainment. They just seem happy. I know that what the TV puts on the screen isn't true.
Last night Derek came bowling with Zach and I at Teton Lanes. We are in our second game and I walk behind Derek so when he pulls the ball back I can take it out of his hands. Well that was pretty funny because he didn't know what happened when his ball disappeared. Well my turn was after Dereks and so he takes my ball and bowls the first turn for me. I wasn't to happy about that. So the second turn they just leave me alone. Well after I pulled the ball back and it was moving forward while still in my hand, I trip on my shoelaces (because they are crazy long on those shoes) and fall flat on my face halfway onto the lane. Everyone was laughing. The next few frames I wasn't doing to good after that. I guess that shows me huh?

A conversation

I don't know what people think can happen when you have a simple conversation with them. Today is my best Friends 20th Birthday. Three years ago I remember going to school being so excited for it to be a Gold day. I walk into the choir room and taking my cello and putting it up. I walk to the top of the room by a door and some file cabinets. Seeing my group of friends all there and then seeing him just sitting there not on his computer, but looking over his little brothers shoulder to watch him play a video game. I can't remember what I got him that day for his seventeenth birthday, but I was glad to see him. That next summer in May we were laying on the sand playground at the Munjor elementary school. I remember asking him what he would do with out me. He rolled over onto his side and said, "Even though I will miss you, Life will still go on, just without you by my side like you have been this year." I just remember thinking my answer to that question. I would die without you. Anyways, that conversation just sticks in my head because of his answer, and how I wish that I could tell him my answer that I have for him. Even though my life is like crap right now, and my parents don't really give a care about me, and my coworkers are like they can only care about themselves. Today I got online on Facebook and noticed that he was on. Just a simple conversation with him made me feel some hope inside of myself letting me know that I do have people out there for me. They may not be the people that I am interacting with, but they are people that I once loved. That I once had a hug from, that once gave me some words of encouragement. Even though I may not love him like I once did, he is a person that reached out to me when I needed help and even though it may not look like he is serious, he listens and understands. Even from miles away. Everyone needs someone like that in their lives. Always.

Friday

Usually Friday's are pretty exciting for me because I can just forget about everything and go out and party. I LOVE FRIDAYS! Except today I worked. While I was working a coworker punched me. Who lets that happen? Well, apparently the place that I work at does. Other than I just want to run. I want to run and start over again. But, you don't get to do that in life. There are a few people that get to do that, but maybe they don't like it very much. I know I didn't like moving at the first thought, but then I realized that there would be stuff that this place doesn't know about me like Hays does. Hays has a lot of stuff that I don't like about me, but so does Rexburg. Rexburg feels like a place that I am just visiting.
For Thanksgiving, my brother and sister-in-law were here. We had an enjoyable time, but then my mother out of nowhere calls me a bitch in front them and Zach. That was really nice, to top it all off, my coworker today and hits me square in the face. Seriously is it just me? Or am I really this bad of a person? To the Farrer Family, I do this post for my friends. My friends hear about everything good in my life, but they don't get to hear why I am depressed when I call them. What am I saying? I know I am a jackass. I am sorry for saying what I did say on my last post. I know that isn't going to heal anything or make you like me again, or whatever you may think that I am thinking while typing this post, but really I am sorry. I am probably just really depressed lately, and I guess I am just taking it out on everyone. Depression hurts, and not only the person who has it. It also hurts those people that they interact with. I guess I am just a depressed little bitch according to the ones that I really care and love. I love all of you for reading this. Maybe, you just think I am doing this for selfishness. Think what you may want, I am not going to force you to think that I am a goody goody little girl. I never was, and I probably will never be. Goodbye for now, don't know if and when I will post again.

My thoughts on a Sunday

As I sit here today on a beautiful Sabbath Day I think of what I am grateful for and review the lessons that were taught today in church. Today during Relief Society I kept having thoughts turn back to my trip in Sept. It was a wonderful trip, and even though I don't have pictures to enjoy it all over again, I still have the spirit burning strong within me whenever I think of the places, or the stories, or just images in my head. I don't think I will ever forget the images in my head, and the strength that I was given. I would go on and on about my feelings of this trip. I had my ankle killing me when I was walking around at these wonderful places, but I still endured, because I had the strength of the spirit and pure excitement running through my veins to see these places. The historical places that I very important to The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints.
Something else I have been asked a lot this past month, is marrying Zach. I love Zach with all my heart and I would have it no other way. I am not forcing him to love me, because I know he loves me more than I can imagine I bet. He too wants to get married, but he is waiting to do it until we have enough money. I don't care who is reading this right now, whether it is Josh, or Jesse, both of you seem to really not like me a whole lot and I don't know the reason for it. Zach doesn't like being told what to do when he knows what he should do. Right now he really doesn't like either of you. I don't know the whole real reason about it, but if it is because of me, LET ME KNOW, and don't take it out on him. We both really do love each other, and when the time works for us, we will get married in the Rexburg, Idaho Temple. I love you Zach, and I know that you know that, but it could never be enough said.

Twillight with Turkey

Nothing much has changed, other than I am working a butt load of hours which is awesome. This week and next week is maintenance week for the pool. The pool is completely empty of water, and we scrub EVERYTHING! The pool floor, the pool walls, the walls of the building, the locker rooms, the lockers in there, the showers (which took me two complete 8 hour days to do) and the offices. That is a lot of cleaning actually. Takes FOREVER! Well, this next week, the college is out for Thanksgiving, and this weekend Twilight is out in Theaters. I don't think I have ever been this excited for a movie to come out ever, well except for the fourth Harry Potter, but that was a mild case compared to Twilight. Zach and I got tickets to see the matinée today. Zach has read the book, and when he saw that it was coming to the big screen (way after I noticed it was), he said that we should go and see it. So we are going today! I am happy. Other than that I am just working my butt off and enjoying it shockingly. Thanksgiving I get to spend with my parents and my brother and his wife (whose dogs I am babysitting this week). My two sisters in Utah will be coming for Christmas, but not here for Thanksgiving. Well, I have lost my train of thought now, so I am going to go and eat and then get ready to see TWILIGHT!

Halloween....ugh!

So the Holiday that I have a hard time liking is Halloween. That is when I had the life changing experience ever! Everything with Zach and I is going good. We still have problems that we are working out, but he knows that this time of the year is hard for me. That is why he wants to to everything fun, possible for us to do! I so bad want to go to the Haunted Mill that I hear so much about! I went to Dr. Slaughter's house of Terror earlier this year for Friday the Thirteenth a while back and that was fun to go to! I am thinking that I want to go again this month. In December, my oldest nephew is going to get married, and my family and I are going to try to go out for his wedding and then visit KS afterwards. Well, I have got to get going now, so I will update later!

Back home!

I can't believe what has happened this past week while being back home. I lost my camera right at the end of the trip, and that has made me upset when I think about it, but it is fine with me, I at least felt the spirit while I was there. Just working on finals for the trip now and that is all. My nieces are coming from Northern Idaho this weekend and stay with their dad/my brother. This week, I have been mostly hanging out with my friends and enjoying my time back home. Been looking for an apartment to stay in, and I was able to contact someone about buying their contract. I am hoping that I will like it there. Other than that I am just starting work again in Idaho Falls at the pool. I heard some news the other day from my fiance that doesn't surprise me that much. He basically told me that his older brother doesn't want me to be part of the family. That doesn't really shock me at all rather than I am glad he didn't tell me while I was on my trip. I feel like I should talk with someone about it, but I just don't know who. I just feel like I can run away, and the only person that will miss me will be Zach. Not his parents, not his brothers, not his sister-in-laws, him, and only him. People just need to grow up. I am not saying that I am perfect, because I know as well I am not perfect. I just wish that people would leave us alone. Zach wishes that too, and he will do everything that he can to stop this useless crap going on. All I know is that I love Zach, and he loves me too. We are going to get married, and we are going to be happy with each other. Maybe all we are asking for is just a little support from everyone. That would be great. I will update later with more complaints, right now, I am just to baffled to continue on! I love you, Zach!

Palmyra, New York!

This evening I arrived with the rest of the group to Palmyra, New York. I absolutely loved it before I came here. There are so many significant sites around here to the church, that this is just a thriving place to be. I also really love the hotel that we are staying at. Really big rooms, even with three beds in it! My room only has three girls in it, so tonight we each get a bed to ourselves. Tomorrow we get to go to The Palmyra Temple in the morning, and then afterwards spend the rest of the morning in The Sacred Grove. In the afternoon, we get to go to the Hill Cumorah, and some places in Fayette, New York. This is where we start on our church history part of the tour, and I am so excited about it. I have always wanted to see the church sites in this area, and guess what!!!! I am doing just that! Well, I should get going so I could get some sleep tonight. Much love to everyone. I love you Zach!

Migraines, and health

Yesterday my mom had an accident. I got home from running into town, and she was sitting on the couch with an icepack around her wrist. She told me that she fell and thought that she might have a broken bone. So in the afternoon dad took her to the hospital and had it x-rayed. Sure enough she broke the bone in the hand that goes to the pinky. So right now she is learning to be left-handed when it comes to certain things and has to be careful with what she does. She is wearing a splint right now until the swelling goes down and then they will put a cast on it. I wish so bad that I didn't have to go so soon, so then I could help mom with everything. Right now I have papers to do for this trip that I will be going on, and this week we have corn ready to pick, and many other vegetables ready to pick today and this week. We leave Saturday night after the Spaulding family reunion in Rigby. That ends around six, and we will just go to Utah after that. My brother and his wife are going to wait to leave till Sunday morning. They get up way crazily early anyways, so they are used to it. Monday we have the Thacker family reunion in Oakley, Utah. That is why we are going down there. My two sister's will be joining us for that also. I will have to leave early from the reunion though so I can get to the hotel in time. We are staying in SLC the first night and then our flight leaves around six in the morning. Yeah, I am not a morning person, so this trip is going to be interesting and I guess we will see how I do with everything. Monday evening we are hiking up to Ensign peak to overlook SLC valley. That sounds so gorgeous. I am just so excited to take this trip. My parents are now trying to find ways for me to stay home from this, but I am not going to give in. No way that I am going to waste twenty five hundred dollars go away like that. I know I will miss everyone, but I am about to have the most eventful trip of my life.
Lately my health has been on the line. Been having migraines like crazy, to where I lost my job, and I am not staying on top of my papers like I should be. My birth father wants me to have tests done, but I don't have the money to do that, and I don't have the time either. He just wants everything his way, and I am sorry, but I am not going to be able to find out what is causing this upon me. I just recovered from a bacterial infection, that almost got me put in the hospital. Had fluid in my lungs, and I was barely breathing. I was able to get some medicine in time before it go to bad. Last Thursday I called in sick with a migraine, and that is when I was told that I shouldn't come to work anymore because of always being sick. I was getting worse and worse throughout the day. I had to go to the ER and finally get a shot around ten or eleven at night. They wanted to keep me over night, but I refused because my insurance doesn't cover it. I am going to have fun paying the bills now! Since then I haven't had a migraine, but I am really concerned that I am going to have another one of those when I go on my trip next month. My parents think that I will be fine, and so they always constantly ask me how my head is doing. Even though I get tired of those questions, I know that they love me and that they are concerned also. This is enough for now. I will post some pictures later of some fun that I have done lately, and I might not have another post until I get back from the East Coast! ~*~Barbara~*~

STUPID LITTLE GIRL I AM!

Today I have been in a really glum mood. Ever since I woke up actually. I took a drive and I went to the palisades, and just sat in the car for a while parked at the dam. Then I decided I would get out and walk towards the water and just think. Usually when I am by water, I think the clearest. Something happened last night that I am not proud of or really happy about. Apparently I was flirting with guys last night. Catherine says that I was just having fun and goofing around like always. Well anyways, Zach got hissy pissy about it, and ran off and did the course all by himself that he didn't even slow down to stay with us. Catherine realized what was going on and decided that we were better off on our own anyways because we were having fun just messing around trying to get our balls into the holes. Zach claims I wasn't a jerk. Well, running off and leaving your fiance/gf/other half/w.e I am, and friends behind isn't? I told him that I am so tired of being treated like a jerk. He still acts like he is in High School. Lately I have been praying about it. I can only think of one thing. RUN! Amanda has offered for me to stay with her in KS while I try to figure things out. Maybe get a job while there and possibly go to FHSU with her down there. Anyways, my family is there, so I would be closer to them. Ever since I have graduated from High School the only reason I stay is to be with my parents. Some part of me has wanted to go to BYU-Idaho, but more of me has actually wanted to go to WSU in Wichita. I don't know. Maybe I am being stupid and doubting myself. Yeah, that is it. I am stupid. I am sure that any of you who read this, completely agree with me on that fact. I am just so afraid of leaving Zach. He says that if I were to break up with him, he wouldn't see any other girl. I don't think that is completely true, but it could very well be. I don't know. I am just being a dumb donkey who is apparently not on the right track.

What really makes me tick.

I feel so bad. For the past two weeks I have been sick, and Zach would come around, and I was still spending time with him, and now he is starting to get sick. Wow, shows how smart I am. I am glad though that he at least goes to work and tries his hardest. Yesterday he came home so sick, that I just went over and watched Pirates with him and then I went home. I wasn't there too long because I wanted him to get some sleep also. The night before he had Derek and Catherine over watching some space movie until like midnight. I got home late also that night. There is one thing lately that I have noticed. PEOPLE! They drive me crazy sometimes. I mean I can't even post something on the internet with Zach's mother getting a phone call about what I said. That is like Tattle telling. My word. People just need to grow up and worry about their own business. Zach is getting tired of it, I am too. What really bugs me also is the people at work. They think they own the place, and that they can treat everyone like crap just because they are lifeguards. It ticks me off when a seventeen year tells me how to close. I have closed so many times, that you will need more than one person with fingers and toes to count it. Ahh screw them. I only have one week left of working there anyways. If they want to be hotheads to other people, I will let them. They are not going to be hot heads with me though. I just wish people would leave Zach and I alone though. That is what he wants because he hates having his mom always get on him. He hates it, and just wishes that they would grow up and be more manly.
Other than that, tonight we are going to the Riot Zone to just like go and have fun. Our friend Catherine is in town before she leaves to go to college in Colorado. Thursday night, he was telling Derek how she got us together. It really was her that said that we should date. Actually she had spent time with Zach, and figured out that he had the likes for me. Then, a few days later came with me to Utah and told me and figured out that I did have a small crush on him. So there you go. She is the matchmaker I guess! But yeah, we are going to do that tonight, and nothing else really comes to my mind. Peace out!! ~*~Barbara~*~

Doctor

So today I went to the Student Heath Center up on campus to see if they could give me something for this terrible that I have. The doctor came into the room and just hear me cough once, and said, "You must be feeling really horrible!" I replied that I was and that I want to know what I have. He listened to my lungs and he told me that I fluid in my lungs. Well, yeah I knew I had that. I have been feeling it for the past couple of days, and I cough it up. So he had me do a breath test, I failed, which showed that my asthma was in place. Then he drew blood. He said that my blood count was way too high, even to fight an infection it was way too high. So I am going back in on Friday to have more blood drawn, and I am also on antibiotics. Other than those few things, he didn't exactly tell me what I have. He advised that I stay away from work though. I shouldn't work until I stop coughing up phlegm, since I am around kids and people who have families. I think I gave whatever I have to Zach. He is starting to get it now. Man, I feel horrible for doing that to him. He has enough on his shoulders, he doesn't need this illness also.
So today I got an e-mail from one of my professors saying that he didn't receive any quizzes for history class on this trip. I replied with my conditions, and he said that he would work with me on that. Especially with my migraines. I am so glad to have professors like that. He said to not worry so much about this class until I finish all the papers for Religion. I just want to give him a hug for that! Other than this illness that I have plus migraines with nausea; I am perfect. At least emotional wise I am perfect. Mom, Dad, and I went over to Zach's and had a talk with them last night. Went way better than I thought it would. Of course, the parents did most of the talking, but they did talk to us. I would've talked, but I have lost my voice for yesterday and today. That is why if you call me, I probably won't answer because I don't have a voice unless you are really good at hearing someone so raspy like I am. But back to the talk. I enjoyed it! I just hope that Zach enjoyed it also. He hasn't really talked to me for a couple days now. Big issue came up, and I think he is still upset about that. Let's just say that he isn't really happy with some people like I think he should. Well, I am going to go take some ibuprofen, and go to sleep. Get some well deserved rest from this coughing. ~*~Barbara~*~

Plans

So today I had three papers due! Wow was that hard. I started on Monday, and I just finished this afternoon at three-thirty. I went to Wal-Mart this morning and got Breaking Dawn. Got there about 11:30 and the line wasn't that long, but then as it got closer to midnight, the line grew dramatically! I was glad that we didn't have to wait long to get the book. I have started it already and I am just about a third of the way through. Right now for my life I am just working mornings here in Rexburg teaching swim lessons, then go to Idaho Falls guarding at night. I don't like working down there so much anymore like I used to. Everyone seems to be mean at each twenty-four/seven. I am glad that I leave in September and then I can come back and find a different job when I get back. Talking about when I get back, Zach and I are hoping to get married when I do. If not, I will just enjoy my time at home without having to worry about school work or anything. Well, I am going to go now so byeas.

Happy Happy Joy Joy!!!!

So today grades came out for Summer Semester 2008! I got mainly B's and one C. I was jumping up and down, that my parents were wondering what happened to me. I am just so excited that I did that well! Especially with all the stress of everything that has been going on, and Savior of the World taking up a whole lot of my time. I first started out my day with getting up at 8 a.m. and going to the doctor at 9:30. He put me on some new medication to try to prevent my migraines, but we don't know if it will work. Then after I headed to work with my two nieces on hand. They wanted to come swimming so bad, so they came! It was such a wonderful day today! I had to be there to guard at noon, and so I got there, and then public swim started at one. Well, I was inside for the first two rotations, and I started rotating at one-thirty. I had a friend brining me some food back from McDonald's, since I was so hungry, and I told her to just leave it in the fridge upstairs. Well, when I go to the deep end, some little kids come up to me and say, "Some boys say that they found poop on the bottom of the pool (deep end). I am like oh great, I have one kid coughing up blood into the water, and another parent yelling at me to do something, and now this!!!! Turned out to be that we had to blow the whistle an hour before public swim ended, so that was a plus for the lifeguards, not so much the swimmers. After work, my nieces went and ate at Sonic for the first time! They said that they pretty much loved it! I was glad for that! Then we went to the Idaho Falls Visitors Center there by the Temple. Turned out that the I.F. Temple was closed today (Pioneer Day), but the Rexburg Temple wasn't. Well, we went and saw Joseph Smith: The Prophet of the Restoration, there anyways. Both of my nieces were practically bawling when the lights came back on afterwards. So were my parents. I cried the first time I saw it, but I haven't been able to since then.
I am so glad that the Road Construction on Highway 20 is about done. It took me 1 hour and 45 minutes to get home yesterday and 1 hour and 15 minutes to get up to St. Anthony today. Weird I know, but that is they way it works! Next week I get to start on my papers, and teaching swim lessons in the mornings, and then working at nights in Idaho Falls. So I have to be ready for the two weeks ahead of me! Watch out here I come computer! To many things to do, and not enough time at all to do all of them. I am checking out for the night and possibly for a while. Gnight!
~*~Barbara~*~

Flying away!

So I woke up this morning, and I looked back on the past seven months and everything that has happened. I have just finished one year of school!!! I can't believe that the time had flown by so quickly. One morning I was dreading getting up at 6 am for class, and now I am finished with school and looking for an apartment in Idaho Falls. WOW! This past week I had a migraine bigger than the Empire State building. Absolutely killed me, so I had to ask one of my professors on what to do about my final, and right now it is incomplete, but it soon won't be hopefully if I can get it finished sometime this week. I was just about over the edge with emotion on what to do about that!
So this week has been interesting. Zach and I spent a little time together, but mostly I have been studying for finals. Then on Friday, Zach went and saw Dark Night, while I was at work in Idaho Falls. He said that he absolutely loved it, but I don't know for myself what it is like. Right now, I am just concerned about something, something that I am just going to keep to myself about. I wish I could keep things straight in my head right now. Especially if we want to get married in November. November 14th is the date that we are looking at, but I personally think that it isn't going to happen. Just like when we wanted to get married this July, this weekend actually is what we were shooting for, but sorta didn't happen. Right now I am just going to enjoy the time that I do with him.
~*~Barbara~*~

Random Quotes!

So in my last year of High school, I got this crazy idea to start keeping track of quotes. Well, it only happened mainly in my government class with Mr. Schiess, but there are some others! Enjoy!

There is no love with out money! Kelsi

America will destroy itself by demanding individual rights. Boyd K. Packer


(The rest are from Mr. Schiess!) Lessons Learned from an old Fat Bald Guy!!


To be an orphan your mother or father doesn't have to die.

Parents will have their children no matter what. You need to raise your children so that other people will love them.

Life should not be left by chance, but cease by choice.

Don't have a Plan B? GET ONE!

Compromise makes marriage possible, Frequent Compromise makes it delightful.

Waste like beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder.

Nothing worth while in life never comes easy.

Pain shouldn't stop you from living.

No bet, No play, No chance of winning.

We put our eyes on in the morning, but we never really look at ourselves in the eyes.

Do the appropriate thing at the appropriate time and in the appropriate place.

Don't let 15 minutes define your life.

Beautiful sunsets are created by impurities in the air, but they are always changing.

Don't Marry an abuser.

Borrowing money turns you into a slave.

Pay yourself $10 a month for the rest of your life.

Budget time as well as money.

Keep a journal, DAILY!

Patch up conflicts with your family.

Friends will change, family won't.

Once a parent, always a parents

Life is 10% happening and 90% attitude.

Be happy by developing a moral code and living by it.

Don't gripe, by involved.

Know what needs to be done and do it as soon as possible.

Marry someone that is better than you, so you can raise yourself up.

Do something - lead, follow, or get the hell out of the way!


I hope you enjoyed these as much as I enjoyed hearing them come from my LDS public school government teacher! Much love to everyone! (Same document from Facebook notes!)

Nothing really

I don't have much to say tonight. Just did errands and have been typing papers for finals! WHOOP WHOOP! I also have started reading the material that I need for my MATS tour and thinking of starting those papers. Other than that I have been in a gloomy mood all day. Just sitting here crying!!
~*~Barbara~*~

CRAZY!

So this weekend was crazy at my house. I had my two sisters from Utah here, and plus my niece. Last night we went to the Demolition Derby here in Rexburg. Uhhhh, it was ok. I have been to better ones in Kansas with my friends. After that Zach, Derek, and I went to Gringo's and just had fun messing around telling jokes and such the whole time we were there. Our Waitress hardly ever showed up to like serve us or anything, and we were in a corner booth so that made it twice the fun! After that we went to Get Smart. Probably the most random movie that I have ever seen for $7.50! But, it was way hilarious I thought. Came home. When I got home my guests were asleep, and the doors were locked and I had no KEYS!!! So I went around to the bedroom window for my parents and scared the heck out of them so I could get in. Zach was laughing at me the whole time though!
Today we went to church and got there in time to partake of the sacrament, out in the hallway of course! Once we got, I was hanging on to my niece the whole time in the hallway, so my arm was like way hard to lift during the rest of Sacrament. We had an Elder from the Seventy speak in our Ward, and when he got up to the stand, he gave a powerful first paragraph. "Brothers and Sisters, I come to you with a gift this morning. This is a gift which I personally get to give to you myself. This morning I received a phone call from President Monson wondering what I was doing up here in Idaho. I said, "Well, I am up here to bless my grandbaby, and give a talk in one of the wards." President Monson then replied, "Well, tell those members of the Ward that you are speaking to, that I love them so very much!"" That just hit my heart so much, and it brought tears to my eyes. The church is so big, and you think that with this many members, you wouldn't be able to get that message out to everyone by yourself, so you send servants to let them know. And those servants know that you do love them. Even if you may not think so, I know that President Monson does love us all and want the best for all of us to return to our Father in Heaven.
On other news: Zach and I went for like a walk this afternoon along the river, nice and peaceful to be away from everyone yelling at my house for a change. While we were there he asked if we think if it would be possible to get married in November. I replied, "I don't know. With everything the way that it is right now, and possibly going as planned, I will be living down in Idaho Falls, and working at the pool a whole lot." So right now it is still up in the air but we are possibly thinking November! Any objections? Let me know then! Otherwise I am signing out for the night and going to work in the morning to teach little ones how to swim!
~*~Barbara~*~

First Post!

Hey everyone at least everyone that is going to read this!
Everything is hetic right now where I am at in my life. I have four days left of school and that means FINALS! Once finals are over with, I get to start writing papers for the MATS tour that I will be going on in SEVEN weeks. Wow, I can't believe that is coming up so quick! Right now I have my two sisters from Utah up here with my little niece and we are all just having a fun time. My brother has his two little girls with him, so I have three of my four nieces with me. Pretty exciting, but everyone likes to yell. With my head acting up the way that it is, I have a constant Migraine, and it gets worse every time one of them talk (yell). The reason why they are up here is because this weekend is the last weekend for Savior of the World and they are up here to see that production. Last night I went to Relay for Life, and if you were there for the opening ceremonies watching the Survivor walk, you would have seen me. Yes, I am a survivor of Cancer and I am proud of it! Well, I have to go so I can get ready.
Barbara